Here’s the secret: you may never stop being insecure. You might develop a kick-ass sense of self-worth and come to truly love yourself, yes. But, there will probably always be one or two things about yourself that you’re less than happy about. I, for example, have always envied extroverted people. I’ve spent many years wishing away my shy, quiet personality and hoping for a livelier, vivacious personality.
Believe it or not, this was a real insecurity for me for a long time (first world problems, I know!) and I’ve only recently made peace with the fact that being extremely outgoing is just not (and will never be) a character trait of mine. Instead of pretending not to have insecurities or apologizing for being insecure, I decided to accept and embrace my flaws and to work at living a life I was proud of, flaws and all.
1. Stop Apologizing For Being Insecure
Being insecure is not a character flaw. We live in a consumer-based culture that tries to convince us that we’re not enough and that we don’t have enough, in an effort to convince us to buy what we feel we lack. It’s no wonder none of us feel whole or worthy or valued. We’re not supposed to. People act like being insecure is a weakness, but it’s not. It’s a result of the type of environment we exist in and the sooner you stop beating yourself up about it, the better.
2. Accept Your Insecurities (But First You Have To Admit You Have Them)
This is where the hard work comes in. It’s okay to have insecurities—in fact, you’ll likely have them for the rest of your life. The problem is when you let them take over your life. Everyone has things about themselves that they’re not a big fan of. The healthiest thing to do in response to this, however, is to acknowledge these flaws, accept them and move on. Focus on enhancing the parts of your body and the elements of your personality that you do like, while giving less weight and importance to the sides of you that aren’t so glamorous.